Intaglio Dragons All The Way Down

chapter 28: The Bottom of the Cliff



The session was over. Frank and Nina were still in Dr. Langden's office, talking about their own lives and issues now, leaving Ava and Cole on the outside. Ava felt like she’d just run a marathon; her whole body was weak. She couldn’t imagine how Cole must be feeling right now... and he wasn’t offering that information up willingly.

Instead, the two of them drove through the streets in heavy silence, the dismal day matching their emotional turmoil. Cole stared out the window; the clouds were a solid slate overhead, the greenish hue at the horizon promising rain. Ava glanced over at him once, and then again, waiting for the moment he’d break, anger replacing his pain. Part of her was too worried to consider that he might actually be able to cope with this information... to manage under the burden of it.

She was scared to hope.

The landscape opened up, the coast and the white-capped crashing waves appearing in the distance. Ava could see the large house; Nina’s changes to the landscaping were underway. There was so much more to her knowledge of the place now. Dark secrets surrounded it. She could imagine Angela standing on the porch in the rain.

It made her sad.

Up ahead, a green sign marking a turnoff to the main highway appeared. The turnoff to the Thomas property was near. Ava lifted her foot off the gas, ready to turn onto the long road that led to the Thomas home.

“Can we just go back to the city instead?” Cole asked. “Go home?” His voice was rough from disuse. This was the first time he’d spoken since they’d left the office. He reached out for her hand on the wheel, squeezing her fingers so tightly it hurt.

“They’ll be expecting us to stay,” she answered. “If we leave, Cole – if we run – then we’ll just have to deal with it all later. That won’t make it any easier.”

Cole nodded, eyes going back to the window. Ava frowned as she pulled the truck onto the driveway. She wanted to say yes to him, but she knew she couldn’t. It was all out there now. This was where it became tricky. She was tired of the secrets. She wanted resolution for Frank and Nina, a little bit for herself, but most importantly, she wanted it for Cole.

Ava drove toward the house, hoping she’d made the right choice. There were logical reasons for staying, but a part of her wanted to get away from here, too. For a moment her father’s voice came to mind: “The hard thing to do and the right thing to do are usually the same thing...”

She pulled to a stop, turning off the truck and stepping out into the wind. The passenger door banged shut. Cole had his eyes on the ground as he buttoned his coat up against the cold. She hadn’t gone more than three steps when she realized Cole wasn’t heading for the house at all; he was walking in the direction of the beach. His rapid footsteps put an increasing distance between them as he strode past the front porch.

“Cole...?” she called out.

She wasn’t actually sure he heard her over the blowing wind, but he stopped immediately. He just stood where he was, shoulders hunched, the dark ruffle of his hair the only movement.

And then he turned.

“Come with me,” he shouted. His voice was a cry of pain.

Ava jogged to his side. His face was grieving and full of heartache, but he smiled when she reached him. ‘That means something…’ He took her hand, kissing her knuckles, and then they headed down to the water together.

: : : : : : : : : :

They walked for a long time without speaking. He knew he should probably try to talk it through – he could see Ava anxiously glancing at him – but he had too much going on in his head right now. Too many things to consider and balance. It felt like his entire world had been twisted around, turned upside down, leaving him struggling to find a foothold. Things he had assumed for almost a decade had changed, and he wasn’t sure how he fit into it all.

They kept walking.

Cole headed up the beach, going the same direction they’d driven out the last time they were here. The route by foot was more direct, and soon they made it to the small, secluded cove where a wall of rock rose up on all sides. They took the rocky trail down to the beach, standing in the lee of the cliff. It was the place where he and Hanna had gone cliff diving. Cole’s footsteps slowed as they neared; he and Ava stood together on the shore, listening to the roar of the waves. The power of the sea had been unleashed by the coming storm.

Ava glanced upward, her eyes on the rocks high above them.

“This was where you’d wait for her to jump,” she said, eyes wide.

“Yeah.”

“That’s a hell of a long way up,” she said. Her voice grew quiet. “And a hell of a long way down too...” She turned to stare at the bottom of the cliff. There was open water, but rocks breaking through it at intervals. Dangerous. “Shit, Cole,” she muttered. “That scares me.”

Cole turned, smirking.

“You don’t like my badass past?”

She scowled.

“I don’t like the idea...” she started to explain, but her throat closed off almost immediately. She closed her eyes, taking a slow breath. “I don’t like the idea that a stupid choice as a kid could have changed... this.”

She pressed against him, her arms wrapping around his waist, holding him close. Cole’s expression shimmered, growing tired and sad.

“Hanna never cared, you know?” He glanced up at the cliff face. “Just figured she could do anything she wanted to. She never worried. Didn’t occur to her.”

The waves crashed against the beach, the rising wind whipping Ava’s hair into her eyes. The blonde strands swirled and danced, blinding her. Cole reached out, tucking her hair behind her ears.

“Is this where you come when you go walking?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he nodded, his eyes darting to the cliff. “I like this place... find it easy to think here.”

Ava pulled herself tighter against him and Cole’s arms wrapped around her shoulders, his chin coming to rest on the top of her head. Her voice was muffled against his coat.

“Why?”

His eyes moved back up again, and Ava lifted her chin. When his gaze came back to her, the silver depths were full of pain.

“She used to make me wait. I’d be out in the water there,” he pointed to the churning surf, “just watching for her and hoping.” Cole stroked her cheek with his thumb. “I guess I’m still waiting for her.”

Ava nodded, remembering her father’s words.

“Yeah. But the two of us are out there in the water together now.” She tipped her head. “You’re not alone anymore, Cole.”

He smiled down at her, hands tightened against her back. Even though his face was still weary, Ava knew somehow that it would be okay, because now there was peace in his expression, too.

: : : : : : : : : :

They reached the stretch of beach leading up to the Thomas house just as heavy drops of rain began to fall. Cole pulled off his coat and he held it over both of their heads as they quickened their pace. It was a futile attempt. Within minutes, the sky had opened, soaking them through to the skin. The downpour scoured the beach, turning the sand to a slurry mud that grabbed at their shoes, leaving Cole and Ava laughing like children as they ran through the rain toward the house.

They came in the front door still giggling. The house was laced with the heady smell of supper, and it struck Ava that they were probably late. Nina popped her head around the corner from the kitchen. She looked tired and her eyes were red, but her face broke into a wide grin as she saw them.

“You’re here,” she said in amazement. She stepped up to the balustrade, leaning over and shouting upstairs. “Frank! Cole and Ava are back! C’mon down and eat!”

Nina came forward, hugging Ava first and then Cole. Ava watched, noticing the slight hesitation before Cole’s hands settled down onto her back, and then the moment he pulled her close. Accepting.

Nina stepped back, smiling and making small talk about the weather. Then she sighed, turning back toward the empty staircase, a flicker of annoyance sharpening her face.

“Supper’s on!” Nina called out again, voice louder. She turned back to Ava and Cole, shaking her head in exasperation. “I swear that man needs a hearing aid, but he’s more stubborn than anyone else I know.” Her eyes jumped to Cole, a smile curling up one side of her mouth. “Well, except maybe for his son,” she teased.

He grinned before his attention drifted to the stairs.

“I can go get him if you want,” he offered. “He in your room?”

Nina’s face changed, growing wary. She reached out and touched Cole’s arm.

“He’s gone up to Hanna’s room...” she paused. and Ava saw the surprise in Cole’s face. “He’s starting to put a few things away. Clothes for now, nothing else.” Nina smiled. “But it’s a start.”

Cole swallowed hard, his eyes on the empty space at the top of the stairs.

“I’ll go help.”